Bedbugs and Cockroaches, by Ethan Holmes

Bedbugs and Cockroaches is a poem I wrote when I was approximately thirteen years old. I was an avid baseball fan and my favorite team was the St. Louis Cardinals despite growing up in Pennsylvania where it was allegedly against the law to root for any team other than the Phillies and Pirates.

Ethan Holmes SLCIn honor of the Cardinals appearance in this year’s World Series against the Boston Red Sox I am, for the first time ever, publishing this crude little homage to the game.

Bedbugs and Cockroaches

by Ethan Holmes

I was lying in my bed one night, about to fall asleep,

When I heard a thunderous racket and I decided to take a peek

I turned my little night light on and looked up at the wall,

There were some bedbugs and cockroaches playing a game of ball

The score was 4 to 3, the bedbugs at the bat,

The trophy they were playing for I found out was my hat

A cockroach pitched the ball using all his might,

A bedbug hit the ball which disappeared into the night

The ball bounced off my bedpost and caromed off my head,

Then headed back to the playing field and struck a cockroach dead

Now my room was all asunder, confusion reigned on high,

And above it all I heard the umpire yell, “You’re not supposed to die!”

Well, no one seemed to know what to do and the score remained the same,

Then the umpire called a conference and decided to call the game

Maybe I can go back to sleep ’cause that appeared to be that,

And I was secure in the knowledge that all was well,

’cause I still had my hat!

Ethan Holmes is the author of five books; Earth’s Blood, The Keystone, Shorts and Other Laundry, A Multi-Pack of Brain Flakes, and Live Your Life In A Crap Free Zone

Check out this excerpt from the upcoming novel Playing With Matches by Ethan Holmes.

Follow Ethan Holmes on Facebook, Twitter and here on his blog page.


About Ethan Holmes

Ethan Holmes currently resides in Northern Arizona and he is the author of seven published books; Earth's Blood, The Keystone, A Multi-Pack of Brain Flakes, Shorts and Other Laundry, Live Your Life In A Crap Free Zone, Water. and his new novella, The Town of Perfect. When he is not writing Ethan is also a professional freelance nature photographer.
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